Why do I want Jesus in my Life

One of my friends started a MEME/weekly devotional for Growing in Faith....If you want to link in go to http://ladybug-chronicles.blogspot.com.



One of the questions was to describe a time in which you knew Jesus was with you?

SO MANY...those that come to mind relate to my family.

January 2000, the birth of my first grandson, I held this precious gift only few minutes old, his lips were blue, skin was ashen and he struggled to breath. He was diagnosed with Strep B...often fatal in babies. For the next week, his o2 levels were dangerously low, he had a little plastic hood to increase his oxegen levels. He was fed thru IV because they were afraid he would aspirate, watching his young mother(my precious baby girl) try to comprehend what was going on through the fear and uncertainty. Every time we even touched him, his respirations would increase, pulse would increase...we were told not to touch him. I stood over his isolette in the NICU stepdown and prayed over this child. This was my first real experience with real intercessory prayer as guided by the Holy Spirit. Tears fell for this little child, and with each tear, my love for him grew, as did my love for Jesus who never left my side.

That same month, my father had already been severly crippled up with a 18 year battle with arthritis. In January he went to the hospital because he bloated with fluid retention...40 pounds worth! That year he went thru the amputation of a leg, artirial bipass in his remaining leg, he went through a round of sepsis. He broke his neck (a complication of the arthritis) and had to have it fused, he struggled to come out of that surgery and ended up on a feeding tube, we were told he would never be able to eat normally again. He was in the hospital that year more often that not. The year culminated with us being told he needed a pericardectomy, but the surgeon would not do it, because he would not survive the surgery. My dear mom, argued with him...and won. The surgeon did the pericardectomy and gave praise to God for my fathers survival. His pericardium was suppose to be thin like paper, the complications of arthritis had caused it to thicken to about as thick as a thick orange peel, it was strangling his heart.

By December of 2000 he was in rehab, I had gone up there to spend a couple of hours with him and cried as I helped him hold a spoon to eat real food and the smile on his face as I brough him a cup of coffee. That Christmas day, we signed him out for the day and he ate Christmas dinner with us. The day after new years he was released to come home.

As I sat in the hospital room(s), if dad was asleep, prayer seemed elusive, but the Holy Spirit provided the words. That year my father survived and thrived beyond what any doctor could dare to hope for. Yes, I do believe in miracles!

In October 2006, my father fell out of his wheelchair, by this time he was a full quad, my mother tried to get him up then called me to help. I knew I was not strong enough to lift him, but I did. That day he broke his leg and developed another case of sepsis. We went through almost 3 months of small daily miracles battling one medical crisis over another. Decisions made regarding his care, fear of life without him, my mother's heart breaking each day to the point it was visible, and I could not do anything to take away her pain, sorrow and fear. Moments when my father was alert enough to laugh (oh how I miss his laughter!)

My biggest fear, I did not know if my father was saved...we had found that he was suffering from aspiration pneumonia repeatedly, he was treated for that, resulting in him becoming more lucid and he asked us...to pray with him. The spirit of God moved over me, I knew my father was saved, God answered my prayer.

During this time, God put me on a fast, I literally survived on about 100 calories a day because all I could hold down was fruit and water,anything else made me ill. During this time, despite the fears, sorrow, anger and emotional turmoil that accompanies the death of a loved one, I was blessed to experience a sense of peace I could not explain. I experienced the opportunity to witness to others who had family in the hospital.

These have been the hardest most horrendous times in my life. Without Jesus being by my side, I don't not know how I would have gotten through these times.

....I prayed for the healing of my father, he died December 2006. God showed me that He had healed my father, just not the way I was thinking of, for my dad is now in the presence of Jesus, his body again whole...with both legs,hands that can again grasp and hold,and no more pain...

And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away. Revelations 21:4

Dear Sweet Father,

This time has caused me to recall how when I was at my lowest, YOU never left my side. When my heart was fearful and breaking, Your loving arms strenghtened me and comforted me. When I felt so alone, Your love alone overwhelmed me. For that, words alone cannot thank you, I am grateful that YOU can see into my heart and pray it shows you how much I truly love you.

It has brought back joyful moments as well, when YOU rejoiced with me and for me. Thank you for your faithfulness and your love for me. When You showed me the earth and the heavens singing praise to YOU the creator, moments in which I felt so small, and so wholly loved by YOU.

In your son's holy and precious name
Amen