Is Loving Others Hard To Do?

This weeks Growing in Faith deals with the hardest part I have in life, relationships. I don't maintain them well, I walk out on them when I feel that I have become to close or even quicker when I have been hurt or my family is hurt by them.

I find it difficult to love those outside my immediate circle of family. In growing up military, I was always the odd one out, I never did find a group, or circle of friends where I felt that I fit in. It was not until relatively recently that God has shown me it is because "I am in the world, not of the world." Things people would do I just would not want to be around.

This is especially hard for me when I have been hurt or even worse when someone hurts my husband, parents, daughter or grandchildren, I come out like a "mother bear protecting her cubs" and I do not willingly open myself up to that hurt again.

One christmas my BIL was invited to my home. He wanted to bring his girlfriend, we told him not to, as she was married with kids. She should spend the holiday with her children! He brought her anyway. The rest of DH family came as well, and treated me as if I were wrong not to welcome this adulterous relationship into my home.

A couple of months later, DH and I went to my MIL house trying to clear the air, at that point I was accused of things I had not said nor done. My SIL informed me the adulterous affair was between my BIL and his girlfriend and did not affect anyone else (okay, I have a problem with people who make stupid comments). My BIL told me that my husband needed to choose between him and me. My MIL sent a hateful letter for our next years Christmas card indicating that she wished we had never gotten married and that she hoped we divorced soon. I was also forbidden of speaking of the love and blessings God has provided us because "I talk of God to much". (Obviously they don't hold to a Christian faith)

This are relationships that 10 years later I wish to foster and grow. This is the greatest struggle that I have with understand the love of Jesus. I struggle when hubby wants us to meet with these people because they still have no respect for our marriage, but mostly, they have no respect for my faith and things which I find offensive. I struggle with their profanity, and pray my little ones will not pick up those "potty mouth" habits.

Thus my dilema. I don't wish harm on these people, I pray they will all seek God and come to worship him, but does it mean that I am not following Christ when I choose to limit contact with them?

I don't love easily, I pray God will grow me in this area. Amen

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